


My Alexander

by orphan_account



Category: Shadowhunters, The Mortal Instruments (Movies), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: After pandemonium, Angry Magnus, Angst, Bad Parabatai, Hurt Alec, Injured Alec, Malec, Multi, Parabatai, UST, Unresolved Sexual Tension, city of bones - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-21
Updated: 2018-04-22
Packaged: 2019-04-26 01:31:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14391366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Alexander Lightwood is perfectly content with giving his parabatai and sister all the attention. After going to Pandemonium to meet the warlock Magnus Bane, it's undeniable an attraction has grown. Though when it become apparent at his feelings for Jace, Alec refuses to acknowledge it. Instead, he allows Jace to run to Clary and Isabelle to Meliorn while he deals with a demon attack all alone. Yet no one knows what to do when seven hours go by without a word from the blue-eyed shadowhunter, except of course Magnus Bane.





	1. Chapter 1

We had just left Pandemonium and all of my thoughts were clouded at how horrifying tonight was. My faded black shirt had a small tear, though blood covered any of the revealed skin. I didn't bother with an iratze, the light sting felt relieving compared to the disgust of my revealed feelings. 

No one was ever supposed to figure out that I don't like females. I do, but I'm not attracted to them. And no one should have discovered that I was indeed attracted to Jace, much less the man himself. But no, as my parabatai spent more time with the annoying redhead I was being cut out. There was no way Jace didn't know at this point, unless he was as thickskulled as Isabelle declared him to be. Which I suppose would make sense, but I didn't want to ride out on my hopes. They always got me nowhere anyways.

      I suppose I did have one, rather outlandish hope. One that didn't involve Jace, one that I wanted to take to my grave. But the warlock with dark eyes made me feel, I don't know I suppose. Magnus Bane had such an ominous and intimidating name, yet I was greeted with bright smiles, glitter and a unique fashion taste. He was nothing but kind to us, if a bit sarcastic. I couldn't even think about it with crimson coming to my cheeks, but Magnus made me feel...appreciated. 

       My thoughts were stalled as I opened the door to the weapons room. If there was one way to get rid of anxiety at nearly midnight it was by training until you couldn't think of it any longer. And it wasn't as though Jace would notice anyways, from what I heard he had gone to Clary in hopes to comfort her.

Resisting the urge to scoff, I picked up dual seraph blades. My weapon of choice was a bow, it always had been. Jace had never had the patience to learn the skill and Isabelle didn't enjoy the quiet glory of it. No, the bow and arrow was my own to wield. Yet dual seraph blades were for those quick and coordinated, but also an exhausting set. Those who used it either had high stamina or wanted to tire themselves, and while I fit into the first option, I was leaning towards the latter.

I don't know how long I trained. It was after I had taken off my shirt, and after sweat began to cloud my vision. Yet still before my arms were feeling listless, and before the alarm flashed red. 

Three shadowhunters appeared though not one was the redhead, my parabatai or my sister. Frankly I didn't expect them to be. Considering Jace and Clary probably were still together and alone in a room while my sister continued to visit Meliorn. But I could no longer spite them, I didn't have the energy to and it wouldn't help none feel any better about myself.

"It's a minor demon attack, I can take it." I told them gruffly, they all looked stern yet no older than thirty. Perfect to the expectations of the Clave. Though their bleary eyes became widened with relief that someone else would take it.

Without another word, I grabbed my bow and quiver, my stele, a fresh shirt and kept the dual seraph blades with me. It wasn't too far from the East side of Brooklyn. My thoughts drifted to potentially visiting Magnus, declaring that I wanted to go on a date with him and not be ashamed of it. But those were quickly shaken away as I exited the Institute. 

       It was a somewhat long run to where the demons were. I got there in perhaps ten minutes  before my tracking of the demonic activity lighten like fire on gasoline. The monitor did say two to three minor demons, didn't it? I didn't bother doubting myself, my lips pursed and bow leveled with an arrow as I anticipated something. Just what I don't even know, but something.

      My footsteps threaded lightly down an alley, it didn't surprise me to see two small figures. After a moment of squinting, I rolled my eyes. It would take an idiot to not know there are Kuri demons. Their spidery legs weren't appealing to look at, but it was unlikely accompanied by anything I determined.

Taking a moment to assure I'd hit the target, I let the arrow fly, straight into the mouth of the demon. It wasn't especially difficult, nearly getting a smile out of me as the second turned to me.

"Any day now," I grumbled to myself as the Kuri ran towards me. Once again I was about to let the arrow fly before a burning pain shot across my shoulder. I could smell my skin being burned off, my arrow flew dreadfully off course. Instinctively, I notched again at the Kuri demon and spun around to see what the hell had just attacked me.

I nearly cursed myself for being too distracted. The creature was a hydra, its dark green skin and foaming green venom made it distinctive. It's multiple heads had their jaws splayed wide and continued to lean forward towards me. With a sudden jerk of realization, I jumped backwards to avoid the attack. But behind me I felt the Kuri demon claw into my back.

With a pained cry, I took out the dual seraph blades. It was easy enough to knock the Kuri demon away, but getting around the hydra's heads was difficult to say the least. And already I could feel my vision fog lightly. Using my stele, I took a breath and traced an iratze to dull the burning sensation. But more venom dropped upon me, burning through my clothes and onto my scarred skin. I made a quick slash across its neck, the head rolling away and leaving one third of the hydra as a stump.

Once again I cursed my stupidity. I had been the stellar student in all of my classes, if only to impress my mother and father. Yet I still had managed to forget that where one head was severed, two would replace it. And once again, green venom dripped across me, the open wounds continued to sting and the Kuri venom continued to circulate.

All I could do was hope that I had enough energy, or pray someone came to help me. The thought quickly turned spiteful and angry though, my own parabatai had clearly arranged his priorities in such a way that he wouldn't be here in time. Perhaps no one liked me, the angry boy who was the shadow of Jace, the...homosexual. I hadn't officially came out to anyone, but the Clave would probably quickly take to how much of a disappointment I am.

Gritting my teeth, I aimed to strike the hydra in the chest. But instead I was knocked heavily onto the concrete. The blow was hard and painful, allowing more hydra venom to drip across my cargo pant clad legs. I didn't have the energy to stand up, hell I didn't have the energy to keep my eyes open. And so, with a sense of exhausted resolve, I let myself fall unconscious.


	2. Chapter Two

I was beaming, perhaps for the first time since I had separated from Camille. The blue-eyed shadowhunter had become the focal point of my attraction in the entire half hour of my interacting with him. His dark hair and cerulean eyes were my favorite combination while his timid demeanor left me eager to resolve his mystery. And, Isabelle had went through quite some detail of my new crush. Alexander Lightwood had a foreign yet still pleasant sort of tone across my lips. 

My reverie was lost however as my phone began to ring. Though quickly I found myself leaping to it, anticipating the unregistered number to belong to Alexander. Yet just as fast I found myself to be disappointed.

"Hey Magnus, is Alec with you?" Came the worried tone of who I assumed to be Isabelle. At her question I couldn't help but scoff, though not with spite towards her.

"Though I wish Alexander came to visit, alas no. Is he not at the Institute?" I questioned in reply, my brows began to furrow at why Isabelle would call to ask me.

"No, I mean, it is eight in the morning. But apparently he went to deal with some lesser demons around seven hours ago and still hasn't came back." I pursed my lips in thought. My blue-eyed shadowhunter could very well of been injured, then how would I ever be able to date him? 

       "Isabelle," my tone was laced with my own sense of concern though with a sort of sternness. "Come to my loft, bring something Alexander wore recently and I'll track him." 

       Not even twenty minutes later and Isabelle was ringing at my door. As I had hoped, she held three shirts. And given by the faded color and sizes three too large for a giant, I assumed them to be Alexander's. 

       "Where is Jace?" I questioned, glancing to the brunette. Her mascara was streaked and eyeshadow smudged and also wore the same dress that she did the previous night. With a small whimper, Isabelle shook her head. I clung to the t-shirt of Alec's, it was soft and smelled so distinctly of resin of arrows. My eyes fell shut as I tried to reach out for where Alec would be.

        "He's with Clary. Jace clearly only focuses on her anymore." Came her eventual answer. A scowl clouded across as I finally detected such a weak life force. Alexander was on the brink of death.

        "How could Alexander be cursed with such a self-consumed parabatai." I couldn't help but grumble as I conjured a portal. The words fell heavily, but Isabelle didn't deny them. It appeared she had grown used to the same pattern between Jace and Alec. 

        "Where is he?" Isabelle asked, striding to the portal and readying her whip. I shook my head, placing my palm on her wrist to hopefully calm the young woman.

        "In grave danger," came my ominous answer as I walked through the portal. The sun had came up, lighting a wide alley way. On both sides were dark red bricks with white cement gaping them. I quickly glanced for the sight of dark clothes or crimson stains on the pavement and wasn't disappointed.

        There lay Alexander, writhing and gasping in pain. He had many holes all along his clothes, each being spaced apart by bleeding wounds. I nearly cried at the thought of him having been in such a state for hours. How had Jace not felt his pain?

"Isabelle, be a dear and give me your shawl." I commanded with barely contained anger and concern. She let out something between a sob and a choking sound. Though I couldn't currently be bothered with that as the thin material greeted my fingers.

A gaping wound ran along his back, I wrapped the shall across it, hopefully to limit blood loss. A deep sigh came across my lips, why did you have to go alone, Alexander?

"We need to bring him to my loft." Is all I stated, sliding my hands to support his back and behind his knees. Another whimper sounded from Alexander though now he thrashed in my arms. I couldn't help but feel pity as I aggravated the wound. 

"Shh, darling." I murmured, walking through the portal and promptly setting him down on the couch. While the contemporary grey living room set was adorned in luxurious blankets and pillows, taking the blood out would be minuscule. And frankly I was concerned if I laid out blankets, Alexander would be dead before I healed him.

"Isabelle I will need you to hold him down." She nodded, eyes welled with tears as she moved to clasp his hands and press them against the couch. Alexander's thrashing continued with renewed fervor, his chest leaping upward with each gasping breath.

I closed my eyes, allowing energy to course through my fingers and begin to heal the broken man before me. I could detect the demon poison of a Kuri, and the venom of a hydra. It was a miracle he lived through the night, but I couldn't fathom how he was alive. It was unlikely even the best of shadowhunters could face a hydra alone, unless I underestimated Alexander's abilities by threefold.

Trying to take deep breaths, I gritted my teeth in determination. Alexander had fought for a whole night, alone and injured. I could fight enough to extract the poison from his blood. 

It took a great deal of resistance to not stop my ministrations at Alexander's cries. Occasionally I would come to reality enough to hear him pleading in hopes for relief of the pain. Yet I couldn't let it come to pass, not as magic flooded through his blood. I identified a shattered knee cap, dislocated shoulder and a dozen burn wounds to surely scar.

With another hour of silence, all aside from Alexander's cries, my magic was depleted and the shadowhunter was healing. The demon poison had left his blood, but it was clear the recovery process would exceed a week. 

         My eyes were lidded with sleep and my fingers curled around Alexander's pale hand. How wonderful it would be if I had gotten to see him in a state that wasn't frightfully injured. But my anger was beginning to flood through, instead focusing on Jace. The conceited, self-centered, vain, idiotic, irresponsible and inconsiderate parabatai of Alexander. But I knew I didn't have the strength to say all I needed to say to the man with my magic depleted. No, I would rest and before the blue-eyed shadowhunter woke up I would exchange many words with Jace Wayland.


	3. Chapter Three

By the angel, everything hurt. I hadn't mustered the energy to open my eyes, the lids were heavy and sleeping seemed like a paradise I had never visited. My back hurt the most, but it seemed all pressure was on my front. Soft covers surrounded me, though of what material I couldn't identify. I was too busy focusing on where each center of pain was. Was I being tortured? Did I need to bide my time and create a strategy to escape? Where was Jace, my parabatai had to be relatively near. He must be hurt too, why else could I not hear him. Maybe if I opened my eyes...

I soon realized the error in my actions. Peeling back my eyelids I was blinded, though not really. It took several moments to adjust to the beams of sunlight coming through elaborate red curtains with golden embroidery. I groaned, coming to the realization of how much pain I was in. Was everyone okay? How could I be laying in this bed without knowing about Isabelle and Jace. I couldn't sense an injury through my parabatai rune, but that didn't mean they weren't in danger.

Propping my arms up beneath me, I was about to release a sharp cry of pain. But through gritted teeth I suffocated it and tightened my hold on the silky, canary yellow sheets beneath me. The easy part was done, all I had to do was stand up and find Jace and Isabelle. Once I knew they were okay, I could rest easy.

My legs slid across the bed clumsily. I desperately wanted to remain there, curled up and asleep with the wafting scent of sandalwood. But I didn't remember how I got here, just falling unconscious on the cool concrete. I tentatively put weight on my right leg only to wince at the feeling of an open wound. My thoughts snapped away from such a trivial thing as I heard footsteps walking closer, I needed to find a weapon, my parabatai and sister fast.

The next part I expected to hurt, my left knee had been throbbing dully even as I dragged it across the comforter. Yet when I made an attempt to stand, white filled my vision. I didn't even realize the shrill sound of a scream had came from me as my knees buckled, about to send me crashing to the floor. 

No such fall came however, instead I found myself partially suspended. Blue cords surrounded me, which I soon felt numbing the pain and making me sleepy. But I couldn't fall asleep just yet, I had to make sure Jace and Isabelle were okay. 

"Alexander, you are nowhere near the level of health to be walking about." Chided a warm tone, causing the gaze to follow the magic over to the caramel-skinned warlock. Magnus' eyes were warm with mirth but only to veil the concern. He seemed tired, exhausted even, yet I found myself unable to do much but stare at him.

"What-I mean, where- where are Jace and Isabelle?" The words came out hoarse to my ears, like they had been dragged upon gravel. A soft chuckle came from Magnus and I soon found myself being settled back on the bed. His Royal purple shirt with silver detailing had rode up lightly, revealing smooth and soft skin that ended up attracting my gaze. It took a moment to come to reality and fully process Magnus' answer.

"- things to worry about. But your irritating parabatai is on the couch and Isabelle has gone to tell Maryse what happened." He had come closer now, folding a blanket gently across my chest. I quickly averted my gaze from the strip of exposed skin, but by Magnus' knowing smile, he had caught it.

"How are you feeling? You gave everyone quite a scare, Alexander." His words were softly spoken, full of concern as he glanced down at me. As much as I hated being weak, allowing others to see me weak, I couldn't help but appreciate how fondly Magnus appeared. It was strange, having someone's attention, but I craved more of the feeling.

"I'm- well, I mean- I'm fine." Came my answer that didn't even manage to convince me. Magnus had numbed a lot of my pain, between my knee and my shoulder, but where my skin had been burned by hydra venom hadn't been numbed. Given by how exhausted the handsome warlock before me appeared, I decided I shouldn't make him exert more energy on me. That didn't stop him from giving me a disbelieving stare.

No comment could come of it however as the bedroom door shot wide open. The familiar head of blond hair came into my line of sight. I didn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed that Jace was here. He soon flung his arms around my, eyes filled with something not too far from regret. I couldn't fathom why, I hated to see Jace hurt. Or anyone, rather. I would stay up all night to prevent Isabelle from having to wake up with tear-stained cheeks alone after Mother lectured her. Jace I assured had each of his wounds tended to and politely told the women who had spent the night that my brother wasn't interested in continuing a relationship. That was my job as the older brother, I needed to make sure everyone was okay.

"Alec..." he breathed, lightly constricting my ribs and causing me to wince. My parabatai's concern should have flooded me with happiness, my first crush holding an emotional attachment. But instead I couldn't help the irritation that took the place of positivity. Where was he when I had been alone and bleeding? Why hadn't he come sooner? Had he even been the one to find me?

No, I couldn't express my spite. I deserved the pain, deserved to be alone and dying. There was no sense in drawing attention to it, I should be happy someone cared enough to put the effort to heal me.

"Hey..." My voice came out more hesitant than I'd like. It didn't hurt so much that Jace liked Clary, but it did that our shared souls didn't hold more significance than the redhead who had been around for no more than a week. "As assuring as it is that I couldn't be freed from your annoying ass, I think I need to get more sleep."

I let the lighthearted insult act to tell Jace that I was okay, perfectly fine even. It was a way to prevent myself from showing myself as more weak than I felt. There was no way I could stay mad at my parabatai or sibling, I was lucky I even had two people who wanted to fight beside me.

Magnus came into my line of vision once again, his breaths quicker than prior and gaze narrowed as Jace left the room. He was like when smoke builds up in a room until you feel as though you're going to pass out. But it soon eased into a kind smile towards me, tucking the blankets around my shoulders once again.

"You do indeed need more sleep, Alexander. Please let me know if you need anything." His words were so filled with kindness, I couldn't help the small smile that came across. I was still in pain, but Magnus was relieving a hurt that wasn't physical.

"Thank you, Magnus." My voice was hardly louder than a whisper, but I knew the man heard me. I allowed myself to burrow into the blankets, allowing the smell of sandalwood and feeling of silk to coax me into sleep.


	4. Chapter Four

 

  
As the younger man exited Alec’s room, perfectly healthy and well rested, I let my fury wash over me in red hot waves. This man who had made a pledge to fight alongside, care for and protect his parabatai, the blue-eyed Shadowhunter who put the lives of everyone before his, had broken his promise. He had left the man who shared his soul alone in an alleyway to do what only the Angel knew. I gripped him by the forearm and pulled him out into the living area, casting a spell over the dear Nephilim fast asleep in my room to assure he would be undisturbed.

  
“Look, I get it I'm hot and all but it isn't a normal thing to pull someone by the arm.” Came Jace’s quip, lighthearted and teasing. And oh so typical of the man I could only see as selfish and insensitive.

  
“It also isn't a normal thing to leave your Parabatai alone and dying in an alleyway. Did you not feel a thing?” I exclaimed, voice a tone or two higher and louder than usual. But I could already tell it would be growing a great deal more but the way this conversation was going. And by the bobbing of Jace’s Adam’s apple, I was certainly correct.

  
“I-I was helping Clary train and then it was just a lot of pain there. It was so much I didn't think Alec was in trouble and-” My hand raised, blue sparks that were seeping into crimson emanated from the fingertips, it was either that or the glare I pointed towards Jace that caused him to stop speaking. But something between fear and guilt swirled in the blond’s eyes. Though that seemed to stoke the fire building in my chest, it become an oppressive rage instead. He would continue this inconsiderate behavior so long as Alec continued to value everyone over himself and remained too afraid of disappointing his family to bother complaining of it. No, I _refused_ to let that happen. I _refused_ to see those blue eyes again filled with so much insecurity and self-deprecation. For some reason Alec had the honesty and compassion in those very eyes that made me feel the need to defend him, especially against the toxic situation Jace provided.

  
“Jace Wayland, from the moment you opened your mouth I became well aware of what a haughty young man you were. But with that, you are irresponsible, inconsiderate and simply do not deserve Alec as your parabatai. As soon as he woke up he was concerned for yours and Isabelle’s safety, not pausing a moment to think of his own pain if only to assure your safety. Yet when he was alone and dying, his only way to reach out having been through that parabatai bond, for seven hours, you ignored him. And if it had not been for Isabelle, Alec would be dead. And I can promise you this, Jace, if I so much as hear a bird singing that you have not been looking out for your parabatai the same way he does for you, you will realize just why I am the High Warlock of Brooklyn and it won't be in a very pleasant way. Do you understand?”  
His mouth opened for a moment, falling closed before opening again. For a moment I found it amusing how he looked like a fish out of water, uncomfortable though with guilt and denial clear in his gaze.

  
“It's never been this bad, I swear, just- Alec,” as the blond struggled to form a sentence, I silenced him forcefully. A cord of blue magic having covered his mouth and effectively silencing him. My eyes blazed with fury once more.

  
“I don't care if this is the first time, even though I know for a fact it is not. One time is all it takes for you or Alec to be ripped of half your soul. And I am fully informed of just how often he comes to your aid, it's shameful that you can't do the same for him. Now leave my sight, after your poor prioritizing it's clear that you don't deserve to see my Alexander.”  
I didn't bother correcting myself of the possessive. Angel, we weren't even in a relationship and yet I had asserted some sort of dominance on the matter. Jace clearly was too morose to notice, not saying a word as he began to approach the door. And a foot away from the old pine, he turned, looking as though wanting to say something. Yet ultimately decided not to, walking quickly enough for the door to not hit him on the way out.

  
Strangely enough, Isabelle entered the loft hardly a minute later. She had changed as I had noticed, now wearing loose athletic shorts and a heathered blue tank top. While I would usually fawn over the color choice, the furrow of her brows voice her own disappoint with me. Which I supposed was currently mutual.  
“You shouldn't of been that harsh on him,” She chided, to which I merely rolled my eyes and summoned a drink. I didn't make a conscious effort but a neat whiskey was now placed delicately at my fingertips.

  
“Please Isabelle, do tell, is it that you disagree with me? That you feel guilty because right now Alec is suffering from an injury that should've killed him, and that he suffered for seven hours while his sister had a dalliance and his brother was too busy to bother with his parabatai?” My reply was a lazy drawl, but I knew that one was particularly cruel. Of course Izzy and Jace felt guilty, but guilt wouldn't bring Alec back if he had died. In fact, it wouldn't do much of anything. This was the warning the Angel’s sent, of Alec’s undying devotion to his family that they needed to reciprocate. Or they would forever lose the blue-eyed Shadowhunter. 


End file.
